Men can clean and we are very capable! The deciding factor on how well we apply ourselves is more on our mood… nothing new there I know, but let’s look at why I make such a bold statement.
The average man possesses a spatial awareness skill that will present itself when packing the car for a trip, the suitcase for a holiday or re-locating a mess in the home into a “neat” pile somewhere if we need to use the space for something more fun.
One of the key factors in deciding how to arrange a space is knowing all of the elements that need sorting, from which a sort order will be defined.
Each element will have a set of dimensions, a measureable weight and an associated structure which needs to be factored in, as to whether it can be under heavier objects, or able to support larger objects above it without making the pile unstable. Questions like does the item have a void in the middle that will allow the surface to break in on itself if bumped around?
Most guys will pick up on these things and make sound decisions based on this thought process which is why I’m bringing this up.
So when it comes to tidying, the biggest problem we have is not knowing the logic or order of everything in the house as it has been arranged by the lady of the household. So we stand clueless with a pile of ironed children’s jumpers because experience tells it, they do not belong where it would make the most logical sense to us and it’s probable we do not do this enough to remember.
While cleaning, take the kitchen for example. We tend to first sort everything so there’s some kind of order. We start with loading the dish washer, obvious items like plates and cutlery first. Swiftly followed by glasses and cups because we DO NOT like fitting our hands into these small openings with a sponge. Next up, we neatly put in all other miscellaneous objects wherever they may fit until all we are left with are the items that we must wash by hand. Now, by this time, the kitchen looks in a much better state! Now just to move everything into another neat pile to be cleaned and the end is in sight! We start small and work up. Each clean item on the draining board stacked to perfection until all items are done. A quick wipe down of the sides and we can call it a job well done!
Here’s my experience from how a women view this and what they ask.
Why are you putting so much into the dish washer?
Why don’t you just get on and wash and stop piling it all up? You are just moving it around, get on with it.
What is happening here is that women don’t see the bigger picture as we have it laid out in our minds. Or see how we filled the dishwasher and thinks it cannot be done correct, they would not usually make the same use of space.
You will notice that when the whole kitchen is busting with dirty dishes on every open space that your partner will go item by item. Wash it and stack it on the draining board. Quickly running out of space and needing to stop, dry and put away to make space for the rest while filling the dishwasher in the order that things are picked up and very rarely using an area of the dishwasher reserved for plates to put the excess of glasses if needed.
What we then face are accusations of taking our time or acting incompetent in hopes they will finish for us, when all we are doing is applying our logic to solve a set of problems and work as efficiently as possible because we hate to waste more time than needed and hate to do the work and look up every so often to see what looks like zero improvement!
I draw no conclusions from this article and leave it up to the readers who can use this to help their cause and hope they find an effective way to use it! But I will say, if our partners would understand our differences and let us work the way is most comfortable for us, we would be less inclined to steer away from cleaning.
Finally, let me STRESS (prompted by my wife’s immediate reaction to reading this) I am not saying men are better at cleaning or their way is better but that it is different.